c. 1999 Religion News Service

UNDATED _ The book,”All the Man I Need: Black Women’s Loving Expressions on the Men They Desire”(Gateway Publishing), found spirituality and religious convictions ranked at the top of qualities African-American women value in men. Here are a few of the 350 vignettes readers of Essence magazine wrote after reading a notice that asked”How would you describe the ideal man?”:

“I now know that the right thing to look for in a man is faith. Whether it’s God Almighty, Allah or Jehovah, it doesn’t matter. It matters that he believes that God is real and living in his life. It’s a tough and cruel world out there and even Mr. Right has to call on Him from time to time.” _ Dorothy A. Cunningham of the Bronx, N.Y.

“First and foremost, he is spiritual. He has a true relationship with God. This man aspires not to break God’s heart, therefore he’ll try not to break yours. He lights up when the woman God has blessed him with enters a room. He sees great qualities in his woman and encourages her to pursue her goals. He leads his family in worship and prayer. His children look up to him as a role model instead of some athlete or Hollywood star. He loves unconditionally.” _ Jacquelyn Smith of Swissvale, Pa.

“He is not just any man, he is a Black man, an African man. He seeks the legacies of his heritage, the depth of his spirit, the wonders of God and what it truly means to love.” _ DuEwa M. Frazier of St. Louis

“He knows what it means to compromise. He is the man that still kisses your stretch-marked stomach after bearing his children. He is God-fearing, not ashamed to turn over complicated situations to a higher power.” _ Tiffany Michelle Banks of Atlanta

“A few years back when I was young and impetuous, the ideal man for me would have been someone like Michael Jackson, Al Greene, the Indian from the Village People or any other rich, sexy, famous man with an expensive car. But, now that I’m older and a little bit wiser, the ideal man for me is an extremely unselfish, loving carpenter who heals the sick, answers prayers, performs miracles, saves souls and gives life everlasting.

_ Carylon Ann Terry of Americus, Ga.

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