c. 2000 Religion News Service
(Dale Hanson Bourke is publisher of RNS.)
(UNDATED) I spent much of my early childhood in fear. I wasn’t afraid of my parents, childhood bullies, spiders or snakes as much as I was afraid of God.
The fear was fostered by the church of my youth which should have been rated PG-13. Many of the sermons were way too scary for kids. A theological fascination with the end times created a dread of the future that made the Second Coming of Christ sound suspiciously like a science fiction horror movie.
The most frightening recurring sermon was about the day of judgment. On that day, we learned, we would stand before God and have all of our sins read aloud. Every one of them. Even the ones we had forgotten about.
Every cookie pilfered from the cookie jar. Every mean thought. Every time we lied about being sick when we really wanted to stay home in our jammies and watch cartoons.
Even as a little kid I could see that list going on for weeks. So each night, at the end of my bedtime prayers, I tacked on a PS: And please forgive me for everything that I did wrong today and have already forgotten.
I guess I figured if I didn’t itemize I could claim the maximum deductions.
Maybe Rick Rockwell had the same idea.
In case you have been living in a sound-proof booth for the last week, Rockwell is the multimillionaire bridegroom who last week picked his bride out of a lineup of 50 young women who had nothing better to do on a Tuesday night than prance around a stage in Las Vegas before a live studio audience.
The bridegroom was portrayed as a self-made multimillionaire, a sometimes stand-up comic and real estate developer who loved hockey and staying fit. Supposedly he was an all-American guy who had been lucky in everything but love.
But Rockwell forgot about judgment day. Given the capabilities of Internet research and the competition for news, Rockwell is now portrayed as a B-movie actor, a so-called millionaire and an alleged girlfriend beater. Oh, and he leaves old toilets out behind his house. Geez, Rick, did you actually forget about that restraining order and the “Revenge of the Killer Tomatoes” footage?
Anyway, despite the fact that Rockwell now seems like the poster boy for why women are afraid to date, I do have some sympathy for the guy. Sitting in the glare of the TV lights, trying to explain why he threatened to kill his girlfriend, brought back that rush of feelings I had as a kid.
How would I ever explain to God that I had to have an extra cookie when my mom told me just two? What excuse would be good enough to explain why I told Linda Jones I hated her when she grabbed the swing away from me?
Fortunately, my theology has evolved since those early days and I now understand God is more about grace than judgment and sin is less about getting caught than staying close to my Creator.
Sadly for Rick Rockwell, the media do not share this world view.
About the closest those in the media get to grace is “Dateline NBC” reporter Josh Mankiewicz looking at Rockwell skeptically and asking him to explain why he let the air out of his girlfriend’s tires.
Rockwell said he was “trying to get her attention” and is not proud of his actions. As far as the media are concerned, he’s headed for purgatory on that one alone.
Maybe Rick Rockwell is just a nice guy who has lived a little fast and loose. Maybe he’s a real creep whose love of the spotlight shed more light on him than he could handle. Maybe he’s a bit like all of us who wouldn’t fare so well if our sins were paraded for all the world to see.
There’s part of me that still dreads judgment day. But what I do know for sure is that if my sins are going to be exposed, I’d rather take my chances with God than the media.
For that reason I’ve declined Fox’s invitation to appear on “Who Wants to Marry a Carpool Mom with a Million Crumbs in Her Car?” I’m sure close analysis would reveal some of those little gribbles are remnants of cookies pilfered on my way out the door. Just imagine how embarrassed I would be when confronted on “60 Minutes.”
DEA END BOURKE
