c. 2006 Religion News Service

(UNDATED) As I recently watched “The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe” with my sons, I reached a disturbing conclusion: The White Queen of Narnia is taking over the world.

People who have read the book or seen the film know that, when the enchanted realm of Narnia was under the tyrannical control of the White Queen or the White Witch, it was always winter and never Christmas, as the faun, Tumnus, laments.

Well, as it gets closer to Dec. 25 here on Earth, no one wants to mention Christmas. My guess is that the White Witch has been quietly working for years to make it “never Christmas,” using civil libertarians, bureaucrats, advertising agencies, department stores and sometimes grumpy individuals instead of wolves, dwarves and magic wands to do her bidding. And there is no C.S. Lewis anymore to expose her dastardly plot.

My sons’ school concerts have been officially dubbed the “Winter Concerts,” as though freezing temperatures, higher heating bills and roads that need plowing are something to celebrate.

For years, everyone from politically correct school and government officials to major retailers have pushed a “Never Christmas” policy. We’re browbeaten to avoid saying “Christmas” the way that polite society used to avoid the word “sex.”

Sometime in the late 1990s, the Capitol Christmas Tree in Washington became the Capitol Holiday Tree. The name was restored last year, but other cities, such as Boston, have had similar controversies. Even President Bush felt compelled to send out “holiday” wishes in his Christmas cards last year.

Schools, civic associations, even Boy Scout troops (who are usually not prone to the forces of political correctness) have been giving their concerts, plays and parties that same blandly inoffensive “holiday” name. Some schools ban songs that mention the reason that “the holiday” is being celebrated, as though fostering ignorance is the best way to educate children.

Pittsburgh for a while dubbed this festive time “Sparkle Season,” a designation that would more aptly describe the Fourth of July. They have since dropped that designation, but they still won’t dare mention Christmas.

Stores and suppliers of consumer items _ from Target to Lands’ End _ blatantly seek your money and patronage for yuletide shopping while insisting on a Never Christmas policy. Even conservative talk show hosts like Rush Limbaugh and Sean Hannity _ who denounce this Never Christmas policy _ speak of “holiday shopping” as they hawk the wares of their commercial sponsors. That’s like promoting the World Series without mentioning baseball. “We hope you will join us for our coverage of this exciting October sporting event.”

The only time that one is allowed to mention the holiday that falls on Dec. 25 is during summer, when some businesses have “Christmas in July” sales.

Some people argue that “cultural sensitivity” and “desire for inclusion” explain these stealth greetings as Noel nears. “Not everyone celebrates Christmas and some are offended by Christmas greetings,” people note, often sharply. Yes, I suppose that more than 90 percent is not truly “everyone,” and the 5 percent who object to Christmas greetings _ according to one survey _ do constitute “some,” but I don’t buy that explanation.

After all, no one warns against wishing “Happy Mother’s Day” or “Happy Father’s Day” to avoid offending orphans or children of Joan Crawford. We’re not urged to de-emphasize Valentine’s Day out of sensitivity to the lovelorn nor to forgo Thanksgiving greetings to spare the feelings of vegetarians or ingrates. And I have never heard anyone counsel me against wishing “Happy St. Patrick’s Day” out of concern for that vast unfortunate majority who _ through no fault of their own _ are not Irish.

One Christmas Eve a cashier politely wished me “Happy Holiday.” When I teasingly said that he was allowed to say “Merry Christmas” on Christmas Eve, he told me that he had earlier been scolded by another customer for doing just that.

As Tumnus observed about the White Witch: “The whole wood is full of her spies. Even some of the trees are on her side’`’ _ probably holiday trees.

So we need to stand together against the White Queen.

Lest you think I exaggerate, have you noticed how long our winters have been getting lately?

(Pete Sheehan is senior reporter for The Long Island Catholic and a freelance writer living on Long Island, N.Y.)

KRE/PH END SHEEHAN

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