c. 2007 Religion News Service

(UNDATED) It’s been 386 years since grateful Pilgrims invited local Indians to join them for a three-day feast in the autumn of 1621, sowing the seeds for what we now know as Thanksgiving.

And while giving thanks may not be as fashionable now as it was then, experts say it remains a powerful force to heal and restore the human spirit.

Three new books explore how giving thanks, counting blessings and practicing forgiveness _ on Thanksgiving Day and every day _ can transform individuals and personal relationships.

“Thanksgiving heals our injured spirits, and when we share thanksgiving with others it also contributes to their well-being,” says Jay Marshall, dean of Earlham School of Religion in Indiana and author of “Thanking & Blessing _ The Sacred Art: Spiritual Vitality Through Gratefulness.”

His book shows how a conscious orientation toward thankfulness reshapes how people interact with others, live their lives and influence the world around them.

“It requires that we give consideration to the people and events that intersect with our lives,” he says. “We begin to notice those who inspire us and bless us, as well as those who leave us cold or irritated. In the process, we become cognizant of our most cherished values, friends and practices.”

Once a person turns in that direction, there’s usually the realization that positive relationships and moments comprise much of life. “At the very least, this can move us to gratitude and thanksgiving. With time, I believe it transforms our disposition,” Marshall says.

Marshall advocates a Thanksgiving celebration that goes beyond a “passing nod” to the holiday’s original meaning: celebrating new life in a new world. Don’t let Thanksgiving degenerate into a time devoted solely to “stuffing ourselves or watching parades and football,” Marshall says.

For some families, sitting around the table for Thanksgiving is filled with excitement, memories, love and abundance, notes Rabbi Karyn Kedar, rabbi at Congregation B’nai Jehoshua Beth Elohim in suburban Chicago and author of “The Bridge to Forgiveness: Stories and Prayers for Finding God and Restoring Wholeness.”

But for other families, the Thanksgiving table is “difficult, isolating, and lonely. And there are others who have no table at which to sit,” Kedar says. “Taking a moment on this Thanksgiving Day to say out loud, `Thank you,’ can open our hearts in gratitude. If not for the whole day, at least for the moment.

“And,” she adds, “even a fleeting moment of gratitude can be powerful.”

Rituals of blessing and giving thanks, according to such experts, can become central forces in a person’s outlook on life, and can even shape how someone approaches suffering.

“Every ritual is an outward expression, and a dance, of our innermost yearning. There is enormous power in the rituals that we observe involving blessing and gratitude,” says Kedar. In her book, she uses soulful prose to offer new approaches to embracing forgiveness _ ways that emphasize peace and resolution over shame or blame.

In fact, failure to feel and express gratitude is a dereliction in spirituality, says Rabbi Abraham Twerski, a psychiatrist and author of “Happiness and the Human Spirit: The Spirituality of Becoming the Best You Can Be.”

Because feeling thankful and expressing it are uniquely human traits, neglecting them means neglecting the spirit, and could lead to a spiritual deficiency, he says.

People who are not thankful and lack happiness may resort “to various maneuvers that they think may give them happiness,” Twerski says. Some people seek power and control, others turn to destructive behavior. Some feel threatened by being thankful since acknowledging another’s kindness can make one feel obligated. The best course, Twerski says, is to seek internal happiness, not happiness from external things or accomplishments.

To Twerski, daily gratitude, as well as on Thanksgiving, drives this truth home. He scoffs at the slogan: “Give diamonds. Diamonds are forever.”

“Diamonds can be lost. Memories are forever. We can relive pleasant moments of our lives. …`Remember when?’ may be followed by laughter, and all family members may share in adding to the memories,” Twerski says.

(Cecile S. Holmes, longtime religion writer, is an associate professor of journalism at the University of South Carolina.)

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Photos of Marshall, Kedar, Twerski and their books are available via https://religionnews.com.