Martin Elfert

The Rev. Martin Elfert is an immigrant to the Christian faith. After the birth of his first child, he began to wonder about the ways in which the Divine was at work in the world. Shortly thereafter, he joined Christ Church Cathedral in Vancouver, BC, where he and his new son were baptized at the Easter Vigil in 2005 and where the community encouraged him to seek ordination.

All Stories by Martin Elfert

Father Knows Best: Steps toward reconciliation

By Martin Elfert — July 23, 2014
My family is angry and terribly unforgiving in conversation up to now, and filled with righteous indignation at the two cousins who literally managed to steal property out of the hands of another.

Father Knows Best: Why does grief hit at such stupid times?

By Martin Elfert — July 16, 2014
Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness. It took me years to understand that this, too, was a gift.

Father Knows Best: My boyfriend won’t give me a ring

By Martin Elfert — July 9, 2014
What would happen if your fiancé were to give you a ring?

Father Knows Best: How did this column come about?

By Martin Elfert — July 2, 2014
What’s the backstory behind your column’s title, “Father Knows Best”?

Father Knows Best: The joy in following Jewish Law

By Martin Elfert — June 25, 2014
Hey Rev! Can you recommend a book that explains why the Jews are wrong to follow the Law?

Father Knows Best: Can I regain my faith after becoming an atheist?

By Martin Elfert — June 11, 2014
Yes, you can regain faith. How? Well, the same way that you learn to do pretty much everything else: Practice.

Father Knows Best: What happens when we die?

By Martin Elfert — June 4, 2014
“Resurrection” is the Christian answer to your question, “what happens when we die?” And “what is resurrection?” Well, that is one of the great questions of the Gospel.

Father Knows Best: How do I convince a girl to be with me?

By Martin Elfert — May 21, 2014

Picture the people whom you love. Maybe that’s your mom or your dad, maybe that’s a brother or a sister, maybe that’s a teacher or a coach, maybe that’s a friend.

Father Knows Best: Will my faith help me through this sad, lonely time?

By Martin Elfert — May 13, 2014
God may not take away your sadness and loneliness, God may not make your sadness and loneliness make sense. But the peace of God, which passes all understanding, will share in your hardship. Just as that big love did for me more than 20 years ago, God will walk with you through the wilderness.

Father Knows Best: How do you repair trust?

By Martin Elfert — May 6, 2014
The hard news is that, even when trust is reparable, fixing it is a whole lot of work.

Father Knows Best: Does chemistry trump compatibility?

By Martin Elfert — April 30, 2014
Your fiancé deserves to be married to someone who wants to have sex with him. And you deserve the same.

Father Knows Best: A story of gratitude

By Martin Elfert — April 23, 2014
Across a lifetime, there are a handful of relationships in which both parties swear that they are getting the better part of the deal than the other, in which both swear that they are receiving the bigger blessing.

Father Knows Best: I’m depressed. What do I do?

By Martin Elfert — April 15, 2014
Depression lies like hell.

Father Knows Best: My girlfriend wants a big wedding and I don’t

By Martin Elfert — April 9, 2014
Give yourself, your girlfriend, and your family and your friends the gift of being together as you celebrate your marriage.

Father Knows Best: We have different lifestyles, should we still date?

By Martin Elfert — April 1, 2014
I have a theory that most couples are unlikely couples.
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