LDS temple in Nauvoo, Illinois

Baptizing Mom

Two weeks ago, I was baptized for my mother in an LDS temple, and it was one of the most beautiful spiritual experiences I’ve ever had.

movie theater

Missing Mom at the movies

Movies aren’t just entertainment; they’re memories of life and love. When I see a movie a second time I am always thinking about where I was and who I was with the first time. And Mom and I aren’t making those memories anymore.

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The grief that keeps on giving

These episodes don’t happen very often anymore, more than a year and a half after losing Mom. But the grief is always there, gently submerged, biding its time.

single candle

Grief as Liturgy

There is a liturgy to grief, an entire calendar of solemn commemorations juxtaposed with joyful memories.

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Cancer-versary

“Trauma cancer” isn’t a real medical diagnosis, but it is certainly an emotional one. It’s a reminder of how quickly our lives can change. And the changes are irrevocable as the stuff of nightmares becomes our new, unwelcome waking truth.

Bacon

Grief Bacon

Last year on Facebook I followed a link to a terrific article on mentalfloss.com that listed words we should have in English but don’t. Why, for example, does English not have a single word for “the day after tomorrow” or “the day before yesterday”? Other languages do this, and it just makes sense. But the foreign word that stole my heart was the #1 winner:
1. Kummerspeck (German): Excess weight gained from emotional overeating.

This week I'm saying happy birthday to my mom, and good-bye to the house I grew up in.

Making Space for Grief

I have the day off work today. I’m celebrating my mom’s birthday. Had she lived, she would have been 72. So today is going to be a time for celebrating my mom by enjoying things we would have done together. I will eat cake.