Dr. Ben Carson

Ben Carson interprets Jewish history

We still have not recovered from Ben Carson's recent suggestion that American blacks came to the United States as "immigrants."

That’s what America is about, a land of dreams and opportunity. There were other immigrants who came here in the bottom of slave ships, worked even longer, even harder for less. But they too had a dream that one day their sons, daughters, grandsons, granddaughters, great-grandsons, great-granddaughters, might pursue prosperity and happiness in this land.

Actually, Ben — a small quibble. They came as slaves.

But, why should Carson stop there? In the spirit of Purim, imagine what he could do with Jewish history.

"Yes, of course, that whole thing in the book of Genesis where Abraham takes his son, Isaac, to be offered as a sacrifice. Yes, right — I suppose that it was kind of traumatic for Isaac. And I know that he and his old man never talked to each other again after that went down. I got it. But, think of it this way: at least they got to spend some quality time together. A three day trip to the mountains ain't such a bad thing, when you really think about it. And at least that angel came and stopped Abraham from offing his kid."

"The Egyptian slavery thing for the Israelites. They got a whole holiday about that thing. They serve good food. What's that thing where you mash up the apples and the nuts and the wine? I had that at Sheldon's thing last spring. Anyway, everyone goes like the slavery thing was bad. Yes, for some people. But, think of it this way. All of that dragging large stones around — that was good aerobic exercise, wasn't it? You gotta think that at least some of those Hebrews got in pretty good shape as a result of lifting all of that stuff. Am I right here, or what?"

"That thing where the Jews were expelled from Spain in 1492. Bad. Right. I understand. Some of them came to the Americas, so at least we got a new country out of the deal. How bad could that have been? And here's the thing about that whole expulsion thing: travel has been found to be good for your general health. Especially sea travel. So, I really don't know what they're complaining about."

"The Warsaw ghetto. Yes, a lot of Jews had to up and leave the places where they were living. But, have you ever been to that area in Warsaw, where the ghetto is? A very nice area. Not far from that new, great museum of Jewish culture. They could have gone to that museum, it was so close to them. And I am betting that a lot of the apartments that they got to live in were probably better than the ones that they used to live in. Just saying."

We live in a time of alternative facts. That means that we live in a time when truth itself is on the ropes.

And if you liked Ben Carson's re-statement of African American history, you will love Paul Ryan's interpretation of the intersection between theology and sexuality:

“If there was a legitimate way to have intercourse and not get pregnant, God would have included it in His holy books." 

We are in trouble. And that is no Purim joke.

Comments

  1. Well, Sarah was barren for YEARS – until the cosmic joke of Isaac…

  2. That second to the last paragraph threw me. I had no idea Ryan was so thick-headed.
    As for Carson, the tragedy of his willingness to serve as a token negro in a fascist regime is not so much stuff like this, as that his portrait of himself with Christ’s arm around his back indicates an unwillingness to accept everybody else deserves the same treatment from a just deity.

  3. “They got a whole holiday about that thing. They serve good food.”

    Obviously neither Ben Carson, nor Jeffrey Salkin have been at my uncle’s Seder. Yes, there is food served. But it is hardly one’s definition of good. There is a long line of terrible cooks on that side of the family.

  4. Tossing around secondhand epithets does not serve your argument.

  5. There is way too much misinformation. I regularly visit Snopes and Politifact.

    Also, in 2015 Obama made a somewhat similar comment about slaves being involuntary immigrants. I had to go to Breitbart to get that story. Of course I am dumbfounded by the nonsense Carson spews. How an eminent neurosurgeon can have his word view amazes me.

  6. Good article in general, but you do understand that the ““If there was a legitimate way to have intercourse and not get pregnant, God would have included it in His holy books.” thing was on a (dare I say it) ‘fake news site’ – a satire site. Ryan never said that.

  7. It really wasn’t similar. I don’t have the link now, but there is a YouTube video.

  8. Not at all. I thought Ryan was a smart fellow but if this is what he believes, he is not. I just told the truth.

  9. I read the two statements and they are somewhat similar with the reference to involuntary immigrants.

  10. That’s a shame. I’m an annual guest at a Passover Seder and the hosts are phenomenal cooks. I’m lucky to be invited!

  11. Do yourself a favor, don’t look up Carson’s outlandish (and unique only to him) notion that “Joseph” (of biblical coat fame) designed and built the pyramids to “store grain”. I’m not making this up. Let’s take a look at what this flies in the face of: a) All reputable scholarship on Egypt, and the pyramids. b) The inscriptions made at the time by the builders and craftspeople. “Here lies the great so-and so…” etc.) c) Inside we find burial chambers, containing the bodies of dead rulers of Egypt, and assorted trappings. d) The pyramids are mostly made of solid blocks of carved rock. There are only very few narrow passageways leading to the small chambers. Carson seems to think the pyramids are mostly empty space inside. The opposite is true. It would be the most inefficient method to store grain ever conceived. In short, Carson is a total crackpot on any subject besides surgery. (And I’m beginning to have my doubts about that too.)

  12. The company is a hoot and the ever present Manichewitz peach and Baron Herzog wine allow things to get silly.

    “The Haggadah says sip the wine, not empty the glass.”

    My wife and Grandma always end the night a little tipsy.

  13. I would love to. Geography works against me here. Most of my family which attends the Seder live about a two hour drive from me.

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