c. 2006 Religion News Service

(UNDATED) Like any other parent, Karen Bellavance-Grace cherishes the moments big and small: a walk with her sons, a visit with grandparents, a review of a stellar report card.

But as a gay mother who adopted her children through the Massachusetts Department of Social Services, the Northampton, Mass., resident has also watched with dismay as Gov. W. Mitt Romney has maneuvered to allow the Roman Catholic Church to wiggle around anti-discrimination laws that protect gay adoptions.

Romney filed legislation in May to allow Catholic adoption agencies in three Massachusetts cities to refuse to consider gays on religious grounds. The move followed a decision by Catholic Charities of Boston to halt its adoption services after learning that it had to accept gay applicants to comply with state law.

“It’s difficult, because I do respect the rights of private organizations to decide the parameters in which they are going to work,” said Bellavance-Grace, who is married with two sons.

“But it’s really hard, knowing the number of kids out there who need good solid families, to think that some wouldn’t be considered because of their makeup. It’s painful to think that there are children who will be in less than desirable conditions for that much longer,” she said.

Massachusetts’ Department of Social Service adoptions involve children taken from families due to abuse, violence and neglect. Adoption agencies that facilitate matches struggle to find families to take some of the more severe cases.

Bellavance-Grace, who is an aide to Northampton Mayor Mary Clare Higgins, admits that living in this gay-friendly city has made it far easier than in many places to raise a family that includes same-sex parents. And it may make her and her wife, Beth Bellavance-Grace, more optimistic than most.

“Living in Northampton definitely makes things easier. I don’t think any of my kids’ friends or teachers would consider it news that their parents are women,” she said.

But gays across the region are shuddering at the thought that hard-fought rights are under fire _ most especially, the right to marry, but also protections against discrimination.

The Massachusetts legislature is considering a constitutional amendment that would outlaw same-sex unions. The measure is expected to be taken up by state lawmakers in November.

(Julie and Hillary Goodridge, the lesbian couple whose lawsuit helped lead to Massachusetts becoming the only state where same-sex couples can marry, have split up after two years of marriage, The Associated Press reported Friday (July 21).)

“Any sort of attack on the state’s non-discrimination laws is a danger, particularly when we talk about trying to take away or deny families their children,” said William G. Conley of Springfield, a lobbyist for the Massachusetts Gay and Lesbian Political Caucus.

“We’re feeling very, very threatened. It’s as if they don’t want us to have any sort of family,” he said.

Lisa Barstow, spokeswoman for the Massachusetts Family Institute and its voter petition organization Vote On Marriage, said the position of both groups is clear.

“Our feeling is that marriage should be between a man and a woman. The bottom line is that citizens have a right to determine what marriage is in Massachusetts,” she said.

And while neither group has taken an official stand on gay adoptions, Barstow said the sentiments follow a similar philosophy.

“Children deserve a mother and a father. That should be where society sets the bar,” she said.

Massachusetts Catholic Conference Executive Director Edward F. Saunders Jr. said his organization, the public policy arm of the Catholic Church, is upholding church doctrine rather than taking a political stand against gay adoptions.

“It’s not a position that’s been taken by the (conference) or any diocesan bishops. It’s basic church teachings from Rome,” Saunders said.

In Northampton, parents like Nancy and Heather P. Whitley feel unfairly singled out when they hear about efforts to discriminate against them.

“Unfortunately, the bottom line is, you have so many kids out there who need parents,” said Nancy Whitley.

“Why are you wasting your time going after a segment of people who clearly want to be parents, and are good parents, simply because of their sexuality?” she asked. The Whitleys have not adopted.

“I really think the Catholic Church should be more worried about some much more serious problems they are facing now. No one will gain in this one, there are only losers _ and the losers are children,” she said.

In agreement is Marylou Sudders, president of the Massachusetts Society for the Protection of Cruelty to Children, who called the Boston Archdiocese’s decision to halt all adoptions at Catholic Charities “regrettable.”

“It’s just a big loss for the state,” she said, noting that the organization handles 40 percent of all Department of Social Service adoptions. Over the past 20 years, of the 720 adoptions facilitated by Catholic Charities, 13 were with same-sex couples.

“Their decision is not in the best interest of kids. There is no research, nothing, to suggest that gay couples are any less caring and loving than heterosexual couples,” she said.

DSB/JL END LOWNEY

(Mary Ellen Lowney writes for The Republican in Springfield, Mass.)

Editors: To obtain a photo of the Bellavance-Grace Family, go to the RNS Web site at https://religionnews.com. On the lower right, click on “photos,” then search by subject or slug.