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The true Republican religion

It's Trumpianity.

Trump supporters participate in a rally Jan. 6, 2021, in Washington. As Congress prepared to affirm President-elect Joe Biden's victory, thousands of people gathered to show their support for President Donald Trump and his baseless claims of election fraud. The president addressed the rally on the Ellipse, just south of the White House. His supporters later stormed the Capitol. (AP Photo/John Minchillo)

(RNS) — “Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen,” declares the Epistle to the Hebrews, and the latest Ipsos poll makes clear that whatever belief they profess in Jesus Christ, the substance of what most Republicans hope for, and the evidence they do not see, lies elsewhere.

The poll finds 61% of them believe the 2020 election was stolen from Donald Trump; 53%, that he is the “true president”; 63%, that he should run for president again in 2024; 65%, that he is not even partly to blame for the Jan. 6 riot at the Capitol; and 54%, that the riot was led by violent left-wing protesters trying to make him look bad.

All of which makes Trumpianity the true Republican religion. Like Christianity, it is built around the life of one man, culminating in a tale of betrayal and rejection, but with the promise of an ultimate triumphant return.

It is, to be sure, a young faith — one yet lacking a canon of sacred scripture like what church leaders took a few centuries to nail into place. To that end, I offer the following as a small contribution for the faithful to consider, with apologies to Acts 1 and Matthew 5-7.

The former treatise have I made, O Hannity, of all that Donald began both to do and teach

Until the day in which he was ejected from the Holy City, after that he through the Twitter had given commandments unto the apostles whom he had chosen:

To whom also he shewed himself alive after The Steal by many infallible proofs, being seen of them at Mar-a-Lago forty days, and speaking of the things pertaining to his kingdom:

And, being assembled together with them, commanded them that they should not depart from the Party, but wait for the promise of a New Digital Platform, which, saith he, ye have heard of me.

For who can forget when that he opened his mouth on the Ellipse, upon the Sixth of January, with the memorable sayings that are called the Magattitudes:

Cursed are the refugees, for they shall be kept out of the Land.

Cursed are the fake news, for they shall lose their audiences.

Cursed are the Big Tech companies, for they shall be broken up.

Cursed are the taxpayers, for they shall pay their taxes.

Cursed are the libs, for they shall be owned.

Cursed is Antifa, for it shall be scapegoated.

Cursed are the POCs, for their lives shall not matter.

Cursed are they who insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me, for they shall never be satisfied.

Be warned however: Not every one that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into my kingdom; but he and she that doeth my will.

Many will say to me in that day, Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in thy name? and in thy name have cast out devils? and in thy name done many wonderful works?

And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me.

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